The harm was not in the fall.
No, the drawl of tumbling
felt like a bow string released
and when it had ceased, humbling.
Pain was the pull from behind;
where my mind, ensnared in knots,
like a tangled quagmire drogue,
the last threads gone rogue in thought.
Though the relief was also strong,
it set wrong, muddled with guilt.
How could the cost of peace be
all of the things we had built?
Fiat truth,
shelled out like artillery rounds,
inciting starbursts of flak:
we are not the war,
but the shrapnel.
I want to scream
to yell out against the wind
to accost the world before me
condemn those responsible
curse myself too,
I can’t.
I want to rage
to lash out against that stone wall
to become violence upon the leeches
take by force my fair share
fight for life until death
I can’t.
I want to collapse
to fold on myself in despair
to make myself small
diffuse into the static background
become less than what is needed
I can’t.
I want to live honestly
to breathe the fresh air of clarity
to rest on the laurels of defined purpose
move through the world without restraint
act as the situation dictates
I can’t.
I can’t in this climate
so I’ll just wait
…
He leaps
trusting his feet
trusting the earth beneath them.
Speed and grace
feed confidence like flames
sends it racing over hills
sharing in its color.
Darting through grass and trees
the pads of its paws feel like heavy rain
a resonance of force
always remains
bouncing through the bones
a guitar well strung
finely tuned
strumming a rhythm of motion
a crescendo reached
only now – with the rest of time behind us.
It is beautiful music
silenced by pavement
interrupted by the sounds of cars;
Some screeching to a halt
others accelerating.
Such wrath has been wrought in the name of capital,
Empathy extracted from the mouth of existence
To leave it toothless and unable to chew;
Drip fed contradictions and exaggerated insecurities
Until existence is neutralized to nothing more than,
Selling our lives and our time to buy the good life at cost.
Step right up boys and girls, everyone’s a winner!
Come see the sell outs and the golden calves,
For half your earnings you can watch your own execution,
Pay double and unmask the villain
But if you’re too afraid to confront yourself,
There’s a teacup ride where you can go round and round ’til you die
If you vomit, try not to hit the operator,
They paid good money to keep you in circles,
And we wouldn’t want the rides to stop, would we?
Step right up boys and girls, everyone’s a winner!
At least that’s what they tell us to get us on stage.
Shirts and skins, but if you lose they’ll take your shirt; skin too.
And if you win, it will only be for all the people you flayed,
So at least the ones that lose everything,
Can say they never skinned a man,
But they’ll still buy the skin if it says ‘prada’ and is on sale,
To have that moment where it looks like they did, so,
Step right up boys and girls, everyone’s a winner!
Strange sounds and dark concepts,
Where mind and heart confer
To find a consensus
Which the senses will concur.
Perhaps the world restrained,
Will grant my mind rapport,
Bound in contradictions
No mission could restore.
What of this is danger?
Which of us is damning?
I subdue the bizarre,
While you are off dancing.
Grow Gray With Me 