An Indeterminate Number of Trees and Rocks Behind the House

If I die in this place
                        who will find me?

Like a piton
this thought, is stuck in my mind

My sneakers were made for lazy days
for sidewalks and classrooms
they fold over rocks like jerky
       slipping
                  more often than
                             catching.

They are quick to remind me
I don’t belong
                                                 here.

but the height makes me quicker still
               all the while still wondering…

If I die in this place
                         who will find me?

Scaling the cliffside
I look for rebellious roots
terrified brittle limbs
confident rocks
eager to help a hand
miles away
                                                                  my home is empty
the sun is setting
                       and my mind echoes…

If I die in this place

                           Who will find me?

The War Between Two Balloons

His opponent – Dashed against the rooftops
               the victor floats away
the punctuated fabric of their balloon
strained in its ascent
but the ascent is meaningless now.
His opponent – Dashed against the rooftops
becoming more distant with the passing moments
yet closer to him now than ever before.

Further below
their shared heart looks up from the earth
blocking the sun with her free hand
her face twisted
like a bird caught in the strings
               the victor floating away.

Catacombs

We made tunnels beneath the trenches
convenience saddles convenience.
Innovations bound to conflicting desires,
duty ever at the throat of survival;
a war all its own.

Dead sounds, all around
digging impatiently
stopping only briefly to hear
past the heavy breathing
the tremors from outside and within
beyond the fear; listening
for digging.

Somewhere down here
another crew exists
just like our own;
different uniforms
but always like us,
digging, listening.

I can’t help but hope
are they as afraid as we?
will their resolve snap
like a taught frayed rope?
I echo the answer known.

Either way we wind up here
on our backs, peacefully
or on our feet, terrified and blind
holding a thread bare hope
that they aren’t like us.

Listening,
I hear rhythmic pounding
muffled by earth
geography, culture, language
until it stops…
listening
for us, for me-
this translates easily.

We start again in unison
clawing at the earth feverishly
to end this,
to put it behind or above us
stopping only for a hint of a moment.
every few feet we calibrate on the other.

The dirt between us feels lighter now
easier to swallow
forgiving where we cannot be.
The tension between us is metaphysical.
Two fingers almost touching
between sandcastle walls.
It is ocean waves grasping at the shore
hidden depths haunting the water’s surface.

When our pickaxe breaks through
there is a moment of metallic harmony
a crashing of symbols.
Sparks fly like a flash of summer light in the dark
the perfect place to meet.

The tunnels are too small to stand in
too dark to see
too cramped to breathe,
it is struggle enough to kill another
but this close to hell
beneath the war
it is all the world’s anxiety, despair, and cruelty
rabid; unleashed. Some die. Some go on digging.
all remain buried.

Overhead

The air moves with deception
those blue skies and soft clouds
sing a sirens song only heard in the trenches;
a tune that tells us of a home
that will never again exist
buried somewhere beneath the bodies.
What semblance remained we dug away
to keep us always below the horizon.

Up there in the fresh air
terror travels on the breeze as easy as leaves
with metal wings and fire
to burn an anonymous generation.
All things are destined for the ground;
the real war is six feet below
youth running through tunnels
lamenting the tangible and intangible losses;
The death of innocence.
The death of the world they knew.
death itself.

Still, the sky is blue
the clouds are soft
they sing though it is silent
a hint at the end up there
silence
until the shells come.

Veal

Beware the soul that has been broken open,
a good soul should not break so easily
beneath the weight of words that are spoken.
The mouths in this place will move ceaselessly,
let it be silent violence that breaks them.
There is rightness to that kind of ending
the weaker mind can be quickly condemned
but the soft flesh was made for expending.
Exalted are those who, in their trauma
discover that pain is tranquility
for the mind is the essence of Brahma
trapped inside the body’s fragility
be not afraid when the body succumbs
for there is greater suffering to come.

Selling Coffins

Someone is always behind the curtain
don’t listen to the lies they might tell you
the roots of words can be twisted askew
but you can of this one thing be certain
someone is there to exploit your burden
to change the dynamics of all you knew
just to find reasons to make you subdue
as if consumed by some violent sermon.
They cannot fight these battles on their own
so of course they beguile us with their charms
with more wealth than we could have ever known
because the best way they can avoid harm
is to offer us an interest free loan
thus consigned in their name to take up arms

The youth – factory farmed
to keep corpses alive
the impoverished deprived

Lives – are always ending
for those we should be spending.

1999

On the knifes edge of gray
               sirens call out through the fog
the sound is everywhere
               yet always running away.

A dog barks
an angry snap to it – hunger
               the pads of its feet slap
heavy rain against the concrete
               if not for the nails scratching with every lift.

The siren is blaring
               it drowns out the dog
                              save for the scratching Thick fog like white darkness
I know not where to run
               Only that I must
                              to life – to death
my footfalls drown in the sound of that distant siren.

[Remorse in Marble]

A grave assumes that you were never ready
                                    for their loss

Concedes that you are not now, nor never will be willing
                                    to let go

But go they must to the annals of memory to suffer
                                    the long death

Let us be brave in our ending for there are many chapters
                                     to be written