Truancy

Shrug away the saddle of gravity,
and float free through this reality,
unearth the joy of a liberated view.

Up dissolves, always retreating,
down wrestles, always pulling,
Neither are accountable to you.

Forward insists on forging a destination,
while all else is mired in hesitation,
and, as need arises, can be made anew.

Hold fast to your curious nature,
be bold with choices that bring you favor,
in the variety of forwards to pursue.

I know the weight of that pressure,
but nothing can hold you down,
even when you feel the most tethered
don’t be so shook as not to look around,
find your forward and push through.

12 Years a Fish

Proud was I to be one amongst many,
the tireless river and we, the fish.
A school of us united against any,
through life, intent, and fellowship nourished,
various desires but the same wish.
Until the day that place was robbed from me,
poached from a healthier reality,
swimming where they were sedately floating,
casting lures that shattered serenity,
passing in boats with muffled gloating.

Wet Candy

Just light interrupted,
drawing uncrossable borders,
leaving only the essence of me,
punch-drunk and absent definition.

I seek a shape uncorrupted,
shielded from decay by order,
but find no truth I could be,
just light interrupted.

Pursuing new ambitions,
I detail the things I am not,
navigating myself through empty space
drawing uncrossable borders.

Decisions brittle with structure,
see the world pruned,
until most of it has fallen away,
leaving only the essence of me.

Now tasting this form,
unexpected variables emerge;
I am this fleeting sweetness, still
punch-drunk and absent definition.

Peeling

Ripped from the wall, like muscle stripped of skin,
A grotesque shape thrashes with savage intent—
Vengeance not against time, but stagnation itself,
Its cry an absurdity, a proclamation of pain.

The sound pounds the air into submission,
Tempers my ears as iron meets the flame,
Grinds my thoughts into dust, scratches on glass—
All resistance futile, every effort the same.

Still as clouds on a memories moonlit night, I wait,
Watching as it lurches closer with mockery in its gait—
But the misshapen limbs, obscured by shadow,
Twist my mind from body, pulling them apart.

Is it motion, or the void where motion should be,
That contorts reality into something dark, sharp, divided?

Hurricane

All those years of emptiness, a tomb;
inside – gestating such violent dreams,
coalesced into form, condensed, collapsed,
and unleashed ever more as tortured screams.

Calling out across an uncaring void,
to cull the ambitions of lesser forms –
ignite the dark expanse with fire unseen
and raucous solar storms.

A bold pearl is suspended within eternity,
a mote of dust that trembles as it falls,
the ceaseless waves of horror crashing,
impressing their desperation against its walls.

The tiny planet steels itself with hard mountains,
calms itself with vast sanctuaries of ocean,
and soon suffers the anguish as a comfort;
finding growth in the soil of those emotions.

Life then finds purchase after eons of false starts.
It rises, one rung at a time, until it thrives,
standing astride the eternal fires and bear witness,
to the struggle of existence, and survive.

The pearl is set aside for ideas to take their place,
the sound of suffering out amongst the stars
muted by the growing transitive bustle
of wagons, ships, planes and cars.

But the screaming never stops,
the oceans secret the agony away,
holding it in as long as they can,
until met with cooler days,

When contemplative rain falls like bricks,
confident in an end the earth can easily dissolve,
but is met with Discordia’s ancient anger,
and the horrors of time forgotten and unresolved.

With terror, precipitation rises as a squall,
to retreat from the known and unknown,
evading the languid web of fatalism,
rather than become another sterile seed sewn,

The exchange of current and course accelerate,
until the violent motion is more than function,
birthing a determined prophet of intent;
Helios’ blind messiah of destruction,

lumbering towards a pregnant shore,
where years of engineered fertility,
could only now germinate malevolence,
sprouting anxiety, poverty, vulnerability.

The maw of the storm stretches for miles,
carrying with it a spiteful inevitability,
amid the storm’s callous consumption,
solace nestles in life’s tragic tranquility.

What We Began

The self,
absurdly reaching for,
a place on the top shelf,
where we are reached no more,
a solitude of health.

Desire,
a veil across the eyes,
our innards turned to fire,
what reason underlies,
lost in futures conspired.

Panic,
overwhelms emptiness,
drops in the Atlantic,
swallowed by loneliness,
madness becomes frantic.

Lifespan,
the gift turned albatross,
doing all that we can,
to stave the ceaseless loss,
from futures that were planned.

The Quiet

We engineer realities sterile and clear behind closed eyes.
The day cast aside, night is near behind closed eyes.

Fleeting words, ideas not bound by definition.
The shape of unseen worlds appear behind closed eyes.

Forged hands balled in fists swinging in fruitless fits.
Regret building horrors to fear behind closed eyes.

Destinations escape through cracked sidewalks.
Roots stretch deep to interfere behind closed eyes.

Held breath is all that remains for us to fill our lives.
The gait of days stagger like years behind closed eyes.

Unreality, the should be, the could be, permeate.
Voices sharp enough to sear behind closed eyes.

Reflections dissolve, yielding to introspection.
Ourselves to ourselves leer behind closed eyes.

Truth grown monstrous enough to obscure reality.
Comfort stirs in silent tears behind closed eyes.

Life, the now of it, stands opposed to our dreams.
Defiant, we refuse to disappear behind closed eyes.

Impermanence endures, outlasting immortality,
I, Brendon, linger, always here behind closed eyes.

The Inertia of Rachael

No pause long enough for my aging eyes to rest,
the time they need to settle, focus, and define,
is too long for our two realities to align,
all I, we, or any can do is their best;
yet knowing that I still must confess,
the brevity of it leaves my heart behind…
She is so damn fast!

With her now like memories, I am but a solemn guest,
watching as she grows, iterates and refines,
proud she is a part of me, though never mine;
always sprinting ahead, chasing life’s next test…
She is so damn fast!

40 Winks

This now that is forever happens in a blink
though the forever of it pulls harder than time
It rises, lives bombastic, and falls in a wink.

Once again the time taken from me becomes mine,
where I can make great distances out of old dreams,
though the forever of it pulls harder than time.

Still, the life I have is fed full against the seams,
until who I am expands past recognition,
where I can make great distances out of old dreams.

Soon, these wants are not desires but premonition,
as I keep finding reasons to invest in me,
until who I am expands past recognition.

I need only define what angle and degree,
a mere in-between amongst a forest of change,
as I keep finding reasons to invest in me.

Sometimes, the times will distort in ways that are deranged,
this now that is forever happens in a blink,
a mere in-between amongst a forest of change.
It rises, lives bombastic, and falls in a wink.