No pause long enough for my aging eyes to rest,
the time they need to settle, focus, and define,
is too long for our two realities to align,
all I, we, or any can do is their best;
yet knowing that I still must confess,
the brevity of it leaves my heart behind…
She is so damn fast!
With her now like memories, I am but a solemn guest,
watching as she grows, iterates and refines,
proud she is a part of me, though never mine;
always sprinting ahead, chasing life’s next test…
She is so damn fast!
This now that is forever happens in a blink
though the forever of it pulls harder than time
It rises, lives bombastic, and falls in a wink.
Once again the time taken from me becomes mine,
where I can make great distances out of old dreams,
though the forever of it pulls harder than time.
Still, the life I have is fed full against the seams,
until who I am expands past recognition,
where I can make great distances out of old dreams.
Soon, these wants are not desires but premonition,
as I keep finding reasons to invest in me,
until who I am expands past recognition.
I need only define what angle and degree,
a mere in-between amongst a forest of change,
as I keep finding reasons to invest in me.
Sometimes, the times will distort in ways that are deranged,
this now that is forever happens in a blink,
a mere in-between amongst a forest of change.
It rises, lives bombastic, and falls in a wink.
The horizon feels too strange,
the place of it, too alien for destiny.
A haze of guile undulating like waves,
so that as I look upon that distant goal,
my eyes are strained to hold it down,
yet still – I can’t make sense of it,
can you?
I’ve moved so little,
but I know it has moved against me,
together we both are changed,
though surely the journey is lost;
that future stalled while the horizon continues,
unmoved by my confusion,
taking measured steps long past my ramblings.
I cannot hope to keep up,
can you?
The static landscape envelopes me,
in a skyless desert without purpose,
where neither direction nor pace matter.
The horizon, stranger still,
keeps running towards a pointless end,
Sometimes – I swear I hear it screaming,
can you?
I entered this world pure as light,
barren, smooth, meticulously white,
though quickly defiled with desires,
corrupted by eyes blind to sight.
Inward looking for what inspires,
not calm, but chaos to aspire,
unexplored possibilities.
Secrets now fueled and set to fire.
Undertaking hostilities,
nightmarishly tuned as are these,
requires but subtle restraint,
that dreams may also be appeased.
I make no audible complaint,
while I am so forced to acquaint,
with such colors ‘til I grow faint,
not a canvas, but a pile of paint.
Dark depths beneath a smooth surface,
Castaway thoughts, evasive and coy,
break against my expectant lips;
this moment of refuge hides joy.
Casting a glance past the threshold,
where all my dreams have found employ,
constrained within an earthen iris,
this moment of refuge hides joy.
The symphony of everything
silenced now to a quiet decoy,
muted in the choir of nothing,
this moment of refuge hides joy.
Grow Gray With Me 