Monthly Archives: August 2021

Ministrations of an Anxious Mind

Let errant dreams fall beneath tires
the same dreams that can build empires
often plague the mind like wild fires;
they serve only as cruel satire

Friends must be kept at a distance
though they may offer assistance
they care not for your existence;
they serve only with insistence

Success should come with suspicion
one doesn’t achieve ambitions
the thought is a contradiction;
they serve only exposition

No matter what it is you do
I beg you not to misconstrue
the need for personal values;
they serve only to limit you.

Callisto Sleeps

A silent city shoots through the night sky
bold as bastards cornered in the school yard
steel towers lit like candles reaching high.
Time had long since left those finger tips charred;
they desire fire once more before they die.
History and weather have road them hard
left them here to rot in the rust and ruin
the corpse of an industrial bruin.

In truth the bear will ne’er be heard again,
though I feel its voice call to me at night
some haunted tone that resonates with pain
coercing out of that void a subtle light
muted memory strikes in clouds of rain
gifting a pat to which I have no right.
Thus I am brought to worship the carcass;
my minds eye set to explore that darkness.

It smells like the cracked seal of cranberry jam
warring with damp leaves and water logged sticks
The air hits head on like a dislodged tram
rust sharp on cold breeze like broken bricks
Inner workings roil like wolf burdened lambs
the disheveled pipes turning tricks.
A shard of moonlight stumbles down on this
old magic reaching out from the abyss.

Unfinished

In my youth I found challenge everywhere
hidden in words with dynamic meanings
discovering what it’s like to be new
and make sense of the world I was born in.
I hid behind books and entertainment;
as if that would make me feel less alone.

Once put on stage I had to take great care
to decide on my intent and leanings
and pray to find success among so few
who had failed life and lost all but their skin.
I redefined my goals and attainment;
I moved my failures into the end-zone.

My divorce left me drowning in despair
nothing before had been so demeaning
my children’s vision of me torn askew
losing house, home, and all that I had been.
I traded it all for an arraignment;
she poisoned the term “father” on her own.

The days have since wore me down smooth and bare
given me time for order and cleaning
to find value in the years that ensue.

Goals

Things you should do before you go:
– Love so deeply you cry yourself to sleep
– be humbled as you watch your hero weep
– give up on something you are not good at
– make one attempt at “the aristocrats!”
– teach a stranger how to do something new
– teach them how to do it better than you
– endanger yourself helping another
– have a friend call you sister or brother
– find your real family out in the wild
– be accosted for acting like a child
– break something that is irreplaceable
– discover your goals are erasable
– do nothing so long you are entertained
– build worlds from the errant thoughts that remain
– kill and bury yourself at least three times
– forgive yourself of all your crimes
– transcribe your mind into a work of art
– share the words that are etched within your heart
– lose yourself in a place you can’t pronounce
– find yourself mirrored in someone who counts
– tell someone you love deeply “goodbye”
– be content enough with yourself to die.

Lakey the Poet

He moves in circles.

There is color all around
vibrant expositions of the world’s intentions
made like a house of mirrors where all paths are equally masked,

So he moves in circles.

How else would you expect
to find form within function
color within reason
those things don’t move like you or I do
they hide in numbers and abstractions
baked in π to elude the errant eye.

So he moves in circles

And he sees it this way
because this is the way it is
interlocking circles engaged with one another
complimenting each other
as we should be with our friends, sisters, and brothers.

So he moves in circles and the world moves with him,
just as he moves with the world.

Narcissus

Find yourself in the waters reflection
the genuine self in diffused rabble
now a confused amalgamation of light and propagation
spread thin as to be comforted by the prison.

(you cannot leave this place)
the shore impresses on the waves,
as they rail against their shackles
only to split their wrists
and bleed out their intentions.

Might I suggest you just step away
backing out of the commitment slowly
take enough accountability to look yourself in the eye
as you abandon it to the transient and say (goodbye)
leaving it to decay or die
whichever be your predilection.

Myodesopsia

The tramp trembled to look through light
a fast fight with the eyes
against the now nebulous night
filling white wounds like flies.

And the noise! It just kept coming
a deep drumming down beat
to hide the sense of succumbing
in a sweet thrumming treat
ears decisively devour
till it sours and spoils
into something dark and dower
in late hours tired toil.

“Could it be that damn devils drink?”
the tramp thinks through the shakes
light and sound beating him to brink
both synced to bend and break.